Thursday, 7 July 2011

CAUTION: FOR ADULTS ONLY!




This post is meant for those who enjoyed the filthy language of Delhi Belly. Those who made this absolutely (and literally) crappy film a huge box office success. Those who believe obscene cinema is equal to great cinema. Those who believe hurling and hearing gutter words in public places is a hip and cool thing to do. And those who are happy that the bar has been lowered really low in Hindi films.

I was thinking if Mr Delhi Belly Aamir Khan were to re-write classic Hindi film dialogues, how will they read? Here’s a golden collection. You can add your own.

Now, some of you will enjoy these. The rest will get repulsed. I am hoping, really hoping, you belong to the latter group. In any case, alas, you are probably reading the future of dialogues in Bollywood films.

“Sara shahar mujhe Bose DK ke naam se jaanta hai.”

“Bh.. wa Mogambo khush hua!”

“Ch… ye, kitne aadmi the?”

“You b……d, main tumhaare b…..d bachche ki maa banne waali hoon!”

“Kanoon ki g….d bahut badi hoti hai!”

“Ruk ja! Kanoon ko apne haath mein mat le! Apne l… d ko apne haath mein le le!”

“Yeh dhai kilo ki g… d jab phat ti hai, aadmi unth ta nahin, ch…d jaata hai.”

“F…… g taareekh pe F…… g taareekh pe F…… g taareekh pe F…… g taareekh!”

“Aapke t.. ts bahut khubsoorat hain. Inhe choli ke peeche rakhna, nahin to maile ho jaayenge!”

“Ek m…… d machchar aadmi ko hijra bana deta hai.”

“Senorita, bade bade shaharon mein aisi f… k all baatein hoti rahti hain.”

“Pushpa, you b… ch. I hate tears.”

“What’s your f… king name, Basanti?”